my "me" time

I like thinking things that concerns me. I like evaluating people and feelings most especially of myself. I always enjoy my ride to and from the office when I’m alone ‘cause that’s the time when I get to think about stuff and evaluate myself and how I feel. That’s the time when I get to reflect on the instances that’s happening around me. That’s also the time when I get answers to my questions if I’m confused about something. That’s what I call my “me” time.

One of my greatest dreams is to travel somewhere that requires me to ride a plane or bus for hours alone. But I guess that’ll still be a dream to me, because I’m not that strong willed to do such a thing. I still wish though that someday I can do it just for once. I’m sure it will be a fulfilling achievement for me.

Ever since Gib left, “me” times became recurrent. It sort of helped me adjust with the set up that we have right now. It helped me to understand even more and to be grateful that we have each other.

Of course, random thoughts are constant as well as “me” times. Let me list down some of my realizations and the things that made me ponder recently:

Ready to have your own dose of cheese? hehehe :p

• For me one of the advantages of having a Long Distance Relationship (LDR) is you get to be more appreciative of even the littlest of things that concerns the both of you and your relationship. That even with just a single text everything will be okay again after weeks of not having a communication.
  
  
• After my last failed relationship (guy A) I never really imagined that I can still love someone this much. I mean I’ve become the most insensitive and inconsiderate person on earth because of my frustrations. I’ve come to realize that at that moment my feelings towards guy A are just suppressed because maybe somehow I felt that he is not the right person. That no matter how happy I get at that time I always had the feeling that it’s just superficial. There's something in me that's telling me that I can be happier and that I deserve way better that what I have then. The thing is, I just don’t know what, when, where or with whom all I know is that “that” something will come my way in time. I know it’s my fault for I didn’t take that doubt seriously before.
  
  
• And then there came Gib. From the moment that I laid my eyes on him on that fateful night of Aug 14, 2009 (8:30pm, Market! Market!), After 9 long years of not seeing each other, I knew right then and there that it will lead to something more interesting.
  
  
• The feeling of security is a very important factor in an LDR. I know Gib and I are just starting but you see the reason why I have so much faith for this relationship to work is because of what he’d shown me and had done during the times that he’s here. He never failed to let me know and feel how much he loves me and how much he wants our relationship to work. In short, he didn’t gave me any reason to doubt or worry about his feelings towards me. Even I was surprised with myself lately, I didn't know that I can be capable of giving this much trust in someone. That guy really did good great.
  
  
• I realized that I've become more considerate with Gib's shortcomings as well. You see he's a seafarer and maintaining constant communication is really a challenge. Though I'm not saying that it's his fault, it's just that I realized the true meaning of accepting someone regardless of the barrier that there is.
  
  
• It is with Gib that I felt the “this is it!” feeling—I know, so MJ-ish isn’t it? hahaha! But seriously, it’s true. It’s with him that I felt that I can’t be any happier.
  
  
• We are blessed to have a very supporting and understanding family—most especially moms.
  
  
• Cheesiness aside, we’re slowly losing quality friends here in the office. I was talking to my 2 colleagues just this morning and we can’t help but think about the others who left the company who became our friends during their stay. We used to be so happy back then.
  
  
• On a lighter note, our Christmas party is already on Dec 17 at Dusit Thani. I heard everyone should come in their formal attire. What to wear??? What to wear???
  
  
• P.S. WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT SEAFARERS ARE NOT AT ALL TRUE, believe me. Well, for me it isn't. It just really depends on the person.
  

These are just some of the things that I remember thinking about as of the moment. I'm sure there'll be a lot of 'em coming in the near future.